There's no such thing as a Fun Run

I ran a 5k trail run this past weekend.

They usually call these 5K's "Fun Runs".

I guess it's an attempt to make it seem like all the runners join hands and sing "Kumbaya" as they jog merrily along the way.

That's a nice thought. Really.

But it tain't so.

Here's a run down of the race.

The start was good. Exciting. The path led up into the woods and directly onto a gradual hill climb. People starting dropping like flies since they started out way too fast (LATER, SUCKERS. RUDY THE RABBIT, RUDY THE RABBIT).

There were two dads and three kids running near me for a while. The dads were casually talking business (SHUTUP AND RUN YA BASTARDS). The kids would sprint 25 yards, then stop and walk for a while then sprint again (JUST GET THE F- OUTTA MY WAY).

Then some poor dude was way outta breath running up another steep hill. Wheeze, wheeze, wheeze. I thought he was going to pass out (WILL YA KEEP YOUR DAMN BREATHING NOISES TO YOURSELF? YOU'RE THROWING OFF MY RHYTHM).

There was this lady that I kept passing and then she would pass me back. We kept going back and forth for pretty much the entire race. At the last hill, I was able to summon some extra reserves and pass her (EAT MY DUST, CHICKY).

I was able to keep my friend and her 8 year old son in sight for most of the entire race. The kid kept up the good fight until he got a stitch somewhere between mile 2 and 3. I was able to pass him (THERE AIN'T NO WAY AN 8 YEAR OLD IS GONNA BEAT ME. I'LL NEVER LIVE IT DOWN. GOOD RACE LITTLE DUDE, BUT I'LL SEE YA AT THE FINISH LINE).

By this point, I was, like, 25 yards from my friend. I could see her through the woods ahead of me. I was wondering if I could catch up with her (I'M COMIN' FOR YA!!! NOTHIN' IS GONNA STOP ME).

The finish line was in sight. I really thought that I might be able to catch up with her. Wouldn't it be nice to finish together (KEEP LEGS MOVING. KEEP BREATHING STABLE. MUST SAVE ENERGY FOR SPRINT TO FINISH)?

I gave it my all and caught up to her. I passed her on the left. She looked over at me, said "OHHHHHHH NOOOOO!!", and kicked it into high gear. I had nothing left. I had spent it all trying to keep her in sight the whole time.

She beat me in a sprint finish.

We both did the 5k in under 30 minutes. Something like 29:29 with her about 6 or 7 seconds before me.

I went out and ran as hard as I could. The thrill of competition, so long absent, came rushing back. What can I say? I'll never change.

I did get to eat pancakes when I was done. Oh yeah, and I also got a pretty nice t-shirt.

Okay. Here it is.

WARNING: Some of the footage in this video may be gasp inducing to some of you sensitive souls out there. If you don't like action flicks, you might want to pass on this one.

YES. I do ALL my own stunts.

And NO. You cannot be as cool as me.

Later dudes.

Baybee K.T. has left the building.

Giorno Di Padri

Unlike Mother's Day, I really can't blabber on and on about what it's like to be a Father.

I can, on the other hand, discuss what it has been like watching Huzbend become a Father.

A couple of years back, if you asked him about having a baby he would have said, "Kids?!?! Are you f-in crazy? What would we want to do that for? We're not havin' kids." He likes to use WE a lot. To tell you the truth, I was in the same camp as him for a while.

Then something happened. I'm not sure what.

One cloudy weekend, we decided to visit Lost River up in New Hampshire. As we were making our way through the huge boulders and clammy caverns it began to pour. We took shelter under a rock overhang to wait out the rain.

As we were sitting there, Huzbend blurted out unexpectedly, "I'm ready to have kids." I was shocked. It was completely out of the blue. I replied that I was too.

That was it.

During my pregnancy, he was so laid back. He wasn't worried about a thing. I was a little jealous that he could be so calm. Hmph. But, that's him. He had a bunch of fun at my expense too; making fun of my growing belly, my Shrek-like feet, the fact that I could out eat him, that I was leaking milk, etc. He was so excited about being a dad. He made me pose so that he could take a picture of my belly each week. He also made sure that I ate as healthy as humanly possible. But then, he was always the one asking if I wanted to go out for ice cream at 9pm on a Sunday night.

During labor, he was my Go To Guy. Rubbed my back, held my hand during surgery, juggled for me, refilled my water, changed the first poopy diaper.

Then we got home and the REAL work started. He kept that laid back attitude. He helped to keep me grounded and focused on what's really important when I thought I was going to lose my mind. His philosophy has been, "Whatever works/Don't sweat the small stuff". He's been right 100% of the time.

The other day, he said with a huge grin, "You know, I love being a dad."

I love watching him be a dad.

Happy Fathers Day!
Sending much love to Grumpa & GpaC.
xxxooo

Sorry about that last post. That's the last time I ask Christopher Robin for spelling help. Jeez. How embarrassing.

Dude, did you ever here of a little thing called spell check?

Annnnnnnnnnnywayssssssssssssssss.....

Hello to you all and thanks for joining me for my TEN month celebration.

A LOT has happened this month. And when I say A LOT, I mean TONS.

So, last post you saw that I had learned how to crawl. I've had about a month and a half of practice now and I'll tell you, I think I can give Michael Johnson a run for his money. Fastest man alive, huh? Well, he hasn't met me yet.

I have learned to use my newfound mobility in conjuction with my insatiable curiousity to become more powerful than ever before!!! BWA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Mommy wants to know if they make kryptonite for babies.

After about a week of perfecting this crawling thing, I learned that I can put both my arms and legs to work to PULL UP to standing. I quickly put this new skill to use by rearranging my bookcase.

Okay, the downside to standing is that Mommy and Daddy seem to think that if I'm old enough to stand, I'm old enough to start pulling my own weight around the house.

Here's me doing some laundry..... Here's me emptying the dishwasher.....

What channel would you like, Father dear?

I better hold off on the walking thing. Daddy is looking for help with the "yard work". Um. Nope. Doesn't look like much fun to me.

I heard something the other day. I overheard Mommy tell Daddy that "the curse" had come true.

It was somethin' about how my Mommy's Mommy said, "Just you wait! Just you wait until you have a kid of your own. That kid is gonna be just like you. You are SOOO in for it." I wonder what that means?

I'm a perfect little angel. Look at this smile. I mean, come on. Does that look like the face of a kid that would do something like this? Guess I just incriminated myself.

You gotta understand. I can't help it. It's in my blood.

I'll tell you this. The gates they have around here will only thwart me so long.

Ditto goes for this crib thing. It's only a matter of time before I put my master plan into action. Then things will REALLY get interesting.

Hey, did you know that you could stack blocks on top of one another? It's totally awesome.

Sometimes, I am so busy destro....um, I mean playing with things that I really don't want to stop to eat. I get a little, uh, cranky. Yeah. Cranky.

Now, I have some bad news. Don't freak out on me, okay?

I don't have any videos ready to post. I'm workin' on it, I swear. They'll be up soon. There's priorities, you see?

Sometimes a girl has to decide between editing a video and using spit up to create the next modern art masterpeice on the kitchen floor. You know how it is. Spit up ALWAYS wins.

At the end of a long day, such as this, I like to kick my feet up, relax and read a book or two. I find that it helps me clear my mind.
What can I say? To quote a famous poet/sailor-man.....

"I am, what I am."

Bisy.

Backson.

Baybee K.T.

Baby in a Bubble

I swear, I'm gonna do it.

From now on, the "outside" is off-limits.

Do you want to know why?

'Cause it seems that every time we leave the house, K.T. ends up getting sick.

Also, when we're at Baby Class, K.T. always seems to find the kid with the snottiest nose in the room to play with. I swear, I put her on the floor and she makes a bee-line towards whoever sneezes first.

Okay, so it's just a bit of an overstatment to say she gets sick EVERY time. But, she has come down with one cold a month since March.

She came down with another one on Saturday.

I don't want her to get sick anymore. It's horrible. She can't breath, she can't sleep, she cries. I get boogers wiped all over me. I'm like a human-tissue.

Huzbend and I end up not sleeping and then we catch the cold. It took me, like, 3 weeks to get over the last one.

So, that's it. We're becoming hermits.

The Pink Stuff

When we went for Katie's 9 month check-up, her right ear drum was a little red and swollen. At the time, Katie had had a massive cold.

The doc asked me to keep an eye out for ear rubbing, fevers, and/or sleepless nights. She also asked me to come back in about 2 or 3 weeks for a recheck.

I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary and yesterday we went back for her follow-up.

Her ear drum was still red and swollen.

So, it was time to bring out the big guns.....antibiotics.

The doc prescribed her Amoxicillin. The Pink Stuff. What a lucky girl.

I remember two medicines from my childhood:
The Pink Stuff
AND
The Purple Stuff (I have no idea what the real name was)

The Pink Stuff was toooooooooootally AWESOME. I LOVED The Pink Stuff. It tasted like candy. It was always refrigerated too. That made it all the better. It went down smooth, like melted ice cream or a milk shake.

The Purple Stuff was the most horrid tasting concoction on the face of the planet. It's smell made you want to curl up into the fetal position. I hated it. It was the kind of medicine that you had to throw back like a shot so that it didn't touch your tongue. Then you would have to follow it with a chaser of water to wash away any of the remnant taste. God. It was raunchy.

Yesterday, Katie got her first dose of The Pink Stuff. I opened the bottle and the smell washed over me. Mmmmmmmmmm, annnntiiiiibioooooooticsssss.

It was a rough go on the first try. I ended up getting the medicine all down the front of her and all over my hands.

Let me tell you, it was SO hard to NOT lick the stuff off my hands.

I am so weird.

Tag-Team Sleep Deprivation

They must be working together.

I don't know how, but they must be.

9:00pm: Katie gets put in her crib for night-night time.

9:15pm: Katie is sort-of asleep.

9:30pm: Huzbend is playing video games downstairs. I'm reading Time magazine. Katie drops her binky out of the crib. She cries. I run upstairs and put it back in. She falls back to sleep.

9:45pm: Katie cries again. She must be cold. She is only wearing a diaper and pants because it's 80 degrees out. I put a shirt on her. She falls back to sleep.

10:00pm: Huzbend done with video games. Comes upstairs. Katie whimpers, but then quiets down.

10:10pm: Huzbend asleep. Katie asleep. Mommy is still awake wondering if Katie will cry again, if she should buy more sippy cups, if she cooked her granola bars enough, how much replacement windows cost, etc., etc.

10:30pm: Mommy asleep.

11:15pm: Huzbend snoring quietly.

12:00am: Huzbend snoring a bit louder.

1:30am: Huzbend snoring really loud. Mommy wakes up, uses the bathroom, checks on Katie.

2:00am: After puzzling lifes mysteries, Mommy is asleep.

3:30am: Huzbend snoring AGAIN. Mommy decides to sleep downstairs on the couch. She uses the bathroom, checks on Katie, eats a cheese stick and settles in. Finally, time for some sleep.

4:30am: Katie begins to cough. She must have post nasal. She coughs off and on for about 40 minutes. She eventually falls back to sleep.

6:00am: Huzbend awake for his morning workout and breakfast. Mommy drags herself off the couch so she can get some comfi shut eye in bed.

6:45am: Katie is banging her binky on the crib slats.

Oh woe is me.